Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire

Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire is one of the most depressing films I’ve seen in quite a while. It’s also a film I can’t truly relate to: I’m white, can read, and had family pushing me to read and succeed (sometimes). Aside from my unfamiliarity with the events in Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire (that’s how I’m going to say it every damn time) I felt uncomfortable and sad through the entire film. Just when you think things are bad it gets worse – like Lars Von Trier’s Dancer in the Dark, a film which goes from bad to worse to even worse and finally death.

The Silence of the Lambs

Warning: There are potential spoilers ahead (thanks MacTingz)

Until last Saturday night I hadn’t seen The Silence of the Lambs in at least a decade. My uncle, who foolishly took me to countless films as a child, especially R-rated films unsuitable for adolescents, introduced me to Jonathan Demme’s adaptation of Thomas Harris’ novel, bringing me to the local multiplex, buying me popcorn, and establishing my familiarity with transsexuals and serial killers. I was probably nine or ten years old. Luckily my parents didn’t care and even encouraged my viewing of subversive films and books – they were hippies.

The 83rd Annual Academy Awards: The Official Sponsor of Bullshit

Top 10 random thoughts on the 83^rd annual Academy Awards.

1. The King’s Speech wasn’t the best picture on that list (I believe it was either True Grit or Winter’s Bone).  It was good but it wasn’t great; if anything it was mediocre and sentimental and relied on trite tropes.

2. The commercials were really obnoxious, like usual, with the most offensive commercial being the American Cancer Society’s proclamation that they’re, “The Official Sponsor of Birthdays.” What? I didn’t know the ACS had that much authority to assume they have a hand in everybody’s birthday. Of course I think cancer is terrible and I’m hoping when I get cancer groups like the ACS are there to lend a helping hand but by officially sponsoring birthdays they’re overstepping their bounds. If they’re the official sponsor of birthdays I’m the official sponsor of anniversaries. Hear that world? Every anniversary is sponsored by me and this blog!

3. James Franco and Anne Hathaway weren’t that good as the show’s hosts. They gave it their best but it wasn’t good enough. It wasn’t necessarily their faults and I blame the writers, who didn’t write any of the material for the two hosts, but the writing just seemed lazy and stupid this year. In fact, I believe this was probably the worst Academy Awards show I’ve ever seen.

4. When Melissa Leo, or next year’s Best Supporting Actress winner, says “fucking easy,” you only need to cut out the “fuck;” everything else is suitable for young ears.

5. The Fighter was only mediocre, although Christian Bale’s portrayal of a washed-up crackhead was good and Melissa Leo’s performance as an over dominating mother was worthy of an Oscar. I personally felt Jennifer Lawrence’s role in Winter’s Bone was more deserving of the statue, although I’m hopeful she has a nice, long career ahead of her.

6. The only funny thing about turning various movies into trashy pop musicals was the Twilight thing. I’m not a big fan of Mormon vampires with a conscious and that Jacob kid walking around with his shirt off all the time doesn’t interest me.

7. Paying homage to a bunch of old movies so Hathaway and Franco host less was dull. Also, saying the Oscars are more “youth oriented,” is also silly, especially since the youth will watch it regardless of presentation; the youth like watching movie stars talk shit.

8. The beginning skit where Hathaway and Franco travel into Alec Baldwin’s dream was only mediocre and fell apart at the end when the duo mimicked Back to the Future – it didn’t work. If they came onto the stage in the car it might’ve worked but they just came out in fancy clothes and said lackluster things.

9. Kirk Douglas was actually funny, even though he already has one foot in the grave. There were parts of his speech that were excruciating but overall he was quite charming and humorous. It’s too bad Spartacus is going on 100 and sounds like he has Bells Palsy; he was an incredible actor once.

10. Ending the show with an elementary school choir wearing Hanes t-shirts was tacky and made the show seem schizophrenic. There was really no theme for the entire broadcast and the ending was weak. I didn’t even watch at this point, turning off the television and going to sleep.