Wayne’s World

Upon arriving home from work this afternoon I turned on HBO and found myself watching Wayne’s World. Why did I like this film as a youth? It’s terrible; terrible in a way usually reserved for the lowest of the low. I can’t figure out why I enjoyed this in the first place (probably because I was 12 or 13 years old when it came out) but below are the top five reasons Wayne’s World is terrible.

5. A complete and utter misuse of Brian Doyle-Murray and Lara Flynn Boyle.

Who doesn’t like Brian Doyle-Murray? After all, he’s Bill Murray’s older brother and has appeared in many exceptional films: Caddyshack, Groundhog Day, Ghostbusters, etc. Unlike Clint Howard (Ron Howard’s older brother), Brian isn’t creepy…nor did he appear as a creepy child on an episode of Star Trek.

Although Lara Flynn Boyle’s career has been pretty lackluster over the last decade or so (I’m sorry, but the The Practice is garbage and Men
in Black II
is crap) but she did play Donna on Twin Peaks, one of the best shows of all time. Regardless of her bad choices she is a talented actress and taking a role in Wayne’s World is a step down.

4. The terrible dialogue.

“Schwing?” How about “party on?” What about the best one: “Excellent?”
Sure, these lines are parodies of Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure but those only really worked on Saturday Night Live. Taking them outside of a sketch show ruins their satirical effect and instead makes the film a parody of itself. Now Wayne’s World is no longer a parody of cock rock and the whole suburban heavy metal lifestyle but instead a product embracing it.

There are a few moments in the film which are funny. Ed O’Neill’s role as a deranged coffee shop owner is somewhat comical and the Terminator 2 parody is funny but that’s about it. The dialogue coming from the two protagonists, their friends, and their antagonists is embarrassing – there’s really no other way to put it. I was humiliated for the actors.

3. Tia Carrere

Carrere has appeared in a long list of films and television shows but she’s just terrible. I liked her in True Lies but that’s about it. Honestly, I didn’t even think she was that good in True Lies – it was everybody else working towards the film’s success. It’s not that she’s unattractive but she really has no acting chops; I just feel like she’s trying too hard with the material. Also, she’s responsible for such disasters as Kull the Conqueror, Showdown in Little Tokyo, and Harley
Davidson and the Marlboro Man
. In short, Carrere is a shit actress and
brings ruin to everything she touches.

2. The protagonists being a bunch of jackasses

If I knew these guys in real life I’d avoid them at all costs. Don’t get me wrong, I like Led Zeppelin, Star Trek, and music but I don’t like these guys. Basically, they’re fanboy tools. When they bow down and worship Alice Cooper I felt ridiculous for watching this dribble. They do a cable access show where they spout nonsensical one-liners and assume they’re awesome because they like Aerosmith.

1. The terrible music

Not all the music coming out of the late ‘80s and early ‘90s was garbage (right now I can’t think of any incredible bands starting in the early ’90s but I’m sure there are dozens) but the music featured in Wayne’s World is complete crap. Let’s put aside Queen for the moment, since many people really enjoy their music (I don’t), but Cinderella, Bulletboys, and later Eric Clapton, are atrocious. Plus, the soundtrack also features songs sung by Carrere, including a cover of Sweet’s Ballroom Blitz.

In addition, there was just something wrong with mainstream music from the early ‘90s. Wayne’s World came out at the end of the hair metal craze, when bands like Nirvana and Pearl Jam were usurping Poison’s MTV time. Against music like this (and I loathe Nirvana and Pearl Jam) bands like Slaughter and Motley Crue were just comical. I remember Motley Crue released a greatest hits album around the time “grunge” was accepted by suburban white children and covered the Sex Pistols’ Anarchy in the U.K., trying to buy some credibility by attaching themselves to a punk band. Too bad the Sex Pistols suck too and were just another boy band; in fact, the Sex Pistols were one of the groups responsible for making Richard Branson a millionaire.

The film also features music by Red Hot Chili Peppers – an outfit I can’t stand. Yes, Flea is an excellent bass player and John Frusciante is an incredible guitarist but when combined with Anthony Kiedis and the guy who plays drums they suck all the good out of a room. I enjoy when Frusciante and Flea play on Mars Volta albums but that’s about it.

Really, the ‘90s was a bad time for popular music. It was a time when major labels were grabbing anything they thought could turn a profit and if these bands didn’t come along the companies just invented their own groups. This is the era of the Spin Doctors, Hootie and the Blowfish, Garbage, and countless other talentless groups poisoning the airwaves. Remember that scene from Contact where Earth’s broadcasts go out into space, slowly moving backwards until there’s absolute silence? If not here’s a clip:

Can you imagine what aliens would think of Two Princes by the Spin Doctors? They’d think we’re a bunch of jackasses who play hacky sack all the time and watch Mad About You (wait, isn’t that what people did in the ‘90s anyways?). I’d rather not project that image to beings capable of interplanetary travel.

In conclusion, Wayne’s World is absolute garbage and nobody should view it. Of course, HBO broadcasts it multiple times a week but there are better ways to spend your time. Please avoid it at all costs and save the brain cells I lost while watching this piece of shit movie.

Here is the trailer

10 responses to “Wayne’s World

  1. Encrazed Crafts

    While I admit it is not going to save the world’s peace problems, I will say the movie was pretty good. Me-thinks your musical background tainted your viewing of this film, bud XD Your standards are so high for music that anything not good enough in your eyes equals a failure. Not that doing so is a bad thing, far from. Most of the crap out now is terrible and if it were not for youtube’s thousands of samplings and remixes I’d rather sit in silence than listen to what the radio CEOs dictate is popular or not. (“Airheads” spoke about that pretty good, have you seen it, by the way?)

    Back to the movie, you gotta remember it is a comedy and as such they are doing the whole bit for a laugh. Honestly I didn’t even make the Bill and Ted connection until you mentioned it, and I still think they were just talking like people in that genre of music did at the time. In fact, add in a range of slurs, random hatred, and a library of profanity and you’d have the lexicon and dictionary of an average gamer in the U.S. of A. (Not to say Europe is different, but they say their own culture’s idiosyncrasies like bullocks and bloody vs things we more commonly say. Though it seems referring to one another as derogatory forms of “homosexual” is accepted universally.)

    It’s a comedy first, and those movies cannot be judged in the same way as normal. Comedies are perhaps the only genre that can be entertaining and successful merely because their script makes no sense at all, because you aren’t there for the dialog or music, but for the laughs. If you were expecting great dialog and music from a comedy, I can see why you feel disappointed, but I can also then see why a younger you would have enjoyed it more. Probably just wanted to see it as a goof off movie back then, or your tastes changed/you expect more from a movie now, etc.

    (Not to say that comedies cannot be judged at all, just that they are a different breed. A LOT of ‘comedies’ out now rely entirely on aiming at the lowest common denominator. “___ Movie” ‘s for example. Super Hero Movie, Date Movie, etc etc. All of them are cranked out for profit and are walk-out worthy. They cost nearly nothing to make so the little profit they get is STILL profit so they keep making more, no matter how bad.)

    Again, it’s not the end-all be-all of movies, but I still like it. It also introduced me to who Alice Cooper and Queen and all the bands featured were, so it can’t be all bad 😛 To this day when the Bohemian Rhapsody comes on you’re likely to see someone do the head-bobbing and rocking out that was shown within the movie. Not flawless, but better than average, especially compared to what is out *now*.

  2. To be fair I walked into Wayne’s World a few minutes after the Bohemian Rhapsody scene so I can’t claim whether I still like that part or not. However, the rest of the movie was rough. Believe me, I’m a fan of comedy (both high and low brow) and I’ve watched my fair share of crap over the years but I really couldn’t handle Wayne’s World. Honestly, I’m not even sure why I watched it in the first place (and then sat there for the second one). I think there was nothing on, I was doing chores, and I felt these movies would provide decent background ambience – instead they provided a decent blog post.

    There are many comedies where the rules fly out the window and I’m willing to accept this…but not with Wayne’s World. I’d much rather watch the two Bill and Ted films, which are a parody of the entire glam rock and heavy metal scene from the ‘80s and early ‘90s. Wayne’s World, however, is a parody of a parody of a parody – it ceases to retain its satirical effects at that point. I remember watching the old SNL skits and thinking they were funny because they poked fun at inane suburban metal kids; the films instead champion the protagonists, voiding out any satirical effects and turning them into heroes.

    I’ve only seen the first Scary Movie and couldn’t stand it. I know they made about six more but I’ve avoided them. I also missed the Date Movie franchise, the Remember the Spartan’s debacle, and all those other crap films. Thank god. =)

    Hope you’re doing well. Take care man =)

  3. Encrazed Crafts

    “I remember watching the old SNL skits and thinking they were funny because they poked fun at inane suburban metal kids; the films instead champion the protagonists, voiding out any satirical effects and turning them into heroes.”

    Gotcha. In the end the movie transformed the whole thing into a parody of themselves. I can see that aspect, though of course I still enjoy the film hee hee My cousin and I disagree about the recent rash of Disney Pirates movies. (He likes, I do not.) We both see the same scene, but get something out of it differently. And it isn’t even the movie itself that bothers me, it’s that there is so much better talent out there yet movies like that get made no matter how bad just because they are cashing in on the fad or they know the right people.

    I am doin’ pretty good, thanks! Of course, the same to you ^_^ Actually, I was just about wrapping up the first item I was going to give away and you were next on my list. I’m pretty sure wordpress keeps track of the email of everyone who comments, so I was wondering if you would mind me emailing you to ask for your address? I got the idea for the craft, haven’t started work on it yet, but since I’m posting here I figured I’d ask before I was all “Hai thar!” in an unannounced email haha

  4. Thanks for the craft; I’m looking forward to it and just sent you an e-mail.

    I’m not a fan of the Pirate movies either. There’s something obnoxious about Orlando Bloom and I just don’t think the storylines are that interesting. It works well as a ride at Disney – mostly because it’s indoors and air conditioned and Disney gets really hot. I used to work there and I hated it. I had to wear this awful costume when it was 100 degrees out: the hell with that!

    Believe me, I’m not discounting your enjoyment of Wayne’s World. Unfortunately I can’t get into the film and find it silly beyond belief. There’s something ridiculous about it and I just think it’s dated now, especially the music. Cock rock is long dead and a movie glamorizing the terrible hair metal of the ‘80s and ‘90s is silly in 2011. It’s like watching movies deifying disco or break dancing – they just don’t work in any serious way. I like Breakin’ and Breakin’ II: Electric Boogaloo but not because they’re good; I like them because they’re ridiculous. =)

  5. fuck up

    • I’m not exactly sure where you’re going with that. However, if you’re saying I fucked up by watching both Wayne’s World films you are absolutely correct – that was a blunder of extreme proportions. If you’re saying I’m a fuck up…you may be correct. Yet I feel gauging my success in this world (and what actually defines success?) is premature. After all, you don’t know me and I can’t tell who you are (anonymous poster).

      I will thank you for reading my blog and adding to my statistics. Please come back and comment on either my life or my actions any time.

  6. Dont be hating.

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